Can we stop worrying?
When has worrying ever made things better, made the phone ring, brought in more money or removed your health concerns? When has worrying ever changed the situation? I asked this question recently on Facebook and the consensus is that it doesn’t change ANYTHING.
And yet we worry.
Dean Hawkes of Columbia University said that “half the worry in the world is caused by people trying to make decisions before they have sufficient knowledge on which to base a decision.” Okay, that is one of two reasons that we worry – we worry about a decision that needs to be made. Although most business women are pretty good at gathering the facts and making a decision. We have too much on our plates to spend too much time weighing the options. There is a saying that says “80% and go.” If we wait until it is perfect, we’ll never move off the dime. So gather the facts and make a decision – no need for worry here!
But what about that other kind of worrying most associated with women. We worry about our kid’s futures, we worry about our careers and what people think of us and whether or not our family is happy. Talk about non-productive energy.
Here are six great tips from the wonderful Dale Carnegie:
- Crowd worry out of your mind by keeping busy. Plenty of action is one of the best therapies ever devised for curing “wibber gibbers.”
- Don’t fuss about trifles. Don’t permit little things–the mere termites of life–to ruin your happines.
- Use the law of averages to outlaw your worries. Ask yourself: “What are the odds against this thing’s happening at all?”
- Co-operate with the inevitable. If you know a circumstance is beyond your power to change or revise, say to yourself: “It is so; it cannot be otherwise.”
- Put a “stop-less” order on your worries. Decide just how much anxiety a thing may be worth–and refuse to give it anymore.
- Let the past bury its dead. Don’t saw sawdust.
I love the old fashion phrases and yet it is still so relevant.
How about more modern advice? Help Guide offers 5 tips for reducing worry, anxiety and stress in your life. Of course making time for relaxation and taking care of yourself are part of the suggestions but here is something for the chronic worriers that can’t imagine life without a little worry: give yourself permission to worry – set a “worry period.”
Create a “worry period.” Choose a set time and place for worrying. It should be the same every day (e.g. In the living room from 5:00 to 5:20 p.m.) and early enough that it won’t make you anxious right before bedtime. During your worry period, you’re allowed to worry about whatever’s on your mind. The rest of the day, however, is a worry-free zone.
Whatever your method for reducing stress and eliminating worry from your life, remember to ask yourself:
Is my worrying right this minute going to make a difference in the thing that I am worried about?
If the answer is no – then give yourself a little shake and find something else to occupy your mind. Try picking up the phone and calling a friend or co-worker to say hi.